I am obsessed with finding all unanswered questions. Knowing the person who will fall in love with me, Knowing where I meant to be. I always go for searching, looking, and wanting.
I keep my plan up, my route set in the mind. I always want to have options to choose from to figure out the best. And sometimes it makes me directionless. It makes me paralyzed in my own mind.
There is a responsibility, there is pain and there is worry. Yes, I am an adult. But I know there is a life beyond my four-cornered work place. And I believe that one day, you will open up those doors for me, in spite of my reluctance, you will pull me inside. You will make me realize that I was living a doomed life. A life that was consumed by the world.
Most of the time I lack something or if not, someone. I look forward to the boulevard and strive to achieve more to fulfill my life’s course. Sometimes, I think I need to go back to the life manual to figure out to fix the things that I messed up, to search for the person I lost along the endurance.
[bctt tweet=”Dear God, if today I lose my hope please remind me your plans are better than my dreams.” username=”zistboon”]Yes, I still believe in my decisions, my voice, my ability, and my intuitions. But, I also believe in your plans; the journey you have designed to take me to the consummate ocean of peace, my destination.
I dreamed, you beckoned me to cut the alley and move on to the next. I repudiated to follow your instructions, turned down my intuitions, and spurned your blessings. I collapsed. I broke down. I left myself out from everything.
“For every up, there is a down”. Some days are good and others are down right awful.
But then I look at you, I see divine rays, I believe that I’ll be fine again. I believe in your plans. I know you will take me to the road I always want to ride. I am putting down my rule-book, instead of searching, I choose to rest. I know that my God, this universe, my intuitions will fill that hollowness in my life.
[bctt tweet=”Sometimes, we just need to accept the process, that everything will be fine. Because unless we accept our reality, we cannot expect our dreams to be fulfilled.” username=”zistboon”]Dear God, I want you to fight the battle with me. I want to retain the utmost faith of your blessing that you bestow upon me every day. I don’t want let my failure defeat hope and opportunity, I don’t want my worry to destruct your faith. I want my life to be a book of blessings, a prism that will radiate your light.
I let you row my boat when you stand beside me as I watch the sun getting swallowed by the dark sky. From this moment now, I give myself the permission to trust the unknown. Tightening my grip on your hand, I know that someone fights for me regardless of my strengths and weaknesses.
I fall in love with my life.
For people who can relate to me, being curious is good, it helps us think out of the box. But don’t be a moving bunch of question marks. We question something we don’t trust.
Sometimes, we just need to accept the process, that everything will be fine. We need to believe that we are where we are supposed to be. Because unless we accept our reality, we cannot expect our dreams to be fulfilled.
